It was, as the New York Times put it, “The Embrace Seen Around the World.” Coming at a moment in America’s history when a spirit of white-hot partisanship has come to dominate the country’s political culture, Michelle Obama’s hug of former President George W. Bush during the ceremony opening the new National Museum of African American History and Culture seems to symbolize what feels like a bygone age. Then, Democrats and Republicans weren’t waging total war with each other on a 24/7 basis. The ability of the last two presidential families should, at least in principle, stand as an example to the rest of us to rise above our differences and remember that what unites as Americans is, or at least ought to be, much greater than what divides us and inspire others to do the same. Right?

Wrong. Though the Obama-Bush embrace was widely praised, many on both the left and the right who see political discourse as a battle in which no quarter is asked or given also panned it. The problem isn’t so much that most of us lack the obvious decency of these two people but that nowadays political disagreements are not merely policy differences but clashing views of the world.

For most on the left, the fact that George W. Bush is a gracious, funny man who believes in helping others is beside the point. Being able to think well of him as an individual means crediting him with good intentions. But to do that, you have to walk back the thorough demonization of the 43rd president during his eight years in office (contrary to the Democrats’ lament, President Obama wasn’t the first one to get this treatment). To liberals, Bush was a heartless destroyer of civil rights who lied us into a war for oil. Similarly, does anyone really think conservatives, who believe Obama isn’t merely wrong but trying to destroy American civilization as we know it, are prepared to put down their cudgels and credit him for being a good guy? Not likely.

Some of this spirit of hyper-partisanship was a necessary correction to the old get-along-to-go-along way of doing business in the Capitol that predominated in the era before Newt Gingrich and friends helped rebuild the GOP Congressional caucus into a band of conservative ideologues. For too long, bipartisanship meant the establishments of both parties scratching each other’s backs in a non-ideological manner that ensured all of their big government projects would continue to buy votes for as many politicians as possible. But when you get to the point when every possible point of disagreement between the parties becomes a crusade rather than an argument, civility is thrown out the window along with compromises that are rooted in corruption.

All too many on the right really do perceive 2016 as a Flight 93 election, in which conservatives view an establishment liberal like Hillary Clinton as the moral equivalent of terrorist hijackers who must be stopped at all costs and by any means. Over the last several years, Democrats (including party leader Barack Obama) have also relentlessly analogized Tea Party Republicans that wanted to repeal ObamaCare as terrorists. While Donald Trump is easier to demonize than Bush ever was, what we’ve now seen is that—as Hillary Clinton showed us with her “basket of deplorables” comment–liberals see Republican voters as, at best, closet racists. Anyone who disagrees with them—or liberal pet causes like the Black Lives Matter movement—get the same “anyone I don’t like is Hitler” treatment.

More to the point bipartisanship, even of the most elemental civics course variety is simply impossible in a political scene dominated by a bifurcated media. In 2008, when Obama was elected we had already gotten to the point where left and right didn’t read, watch, or listen to the same media. Now with Americans increasingly getting their news via social media where they can completely insulate themselves from opposing views—and to “defriend” or “unfollow” anyone whose views they don’t like—common ground isn’t just hard to find; it’s inconceivable.

Under such circumstances, it’s going to take a helluva lot more than a cute photo between two ruling families who are part of that most elite of clubs to convince the rank-and-file to put down their pitchforks and flaming torches and play nicely with each other.